Sexxaayyy Thang!

How to look sexy in Chicago (Or potential way to meet a man IF you are single):

1. Wear sexy black high heels with jeans and conservative black sweater.
2. Attend workshop that is extremely boring but you cannot leave because you stupidly sat in the front.
3. Cross your legs so that you can write in your book while pretending you are listening and taking notes so that you appear polite.
4. When speaker finishes and is about to change over to second speaker, grab bag and attempt to bolt from room.
5. Ensure foot has fallen asleep so that when you take a step on it, you literally crumple to the ground, dramatically FALLING on man in expensive suit.
6. If possible ensure you fall on hot man (I did not do this!)
7. Use hand to brace fall. I "chose" to put hand on knee but you can select whatever body part you feel up to falling onto.

If I were still single, I would definitely look into using this approach as it got me lots of very unwanted attention. As I am not single, I just avoided all eye contact, apologized and dragged dead foot out of room.