Tradiing spouses

This week has been less than stellar. I guess it hasn't been all that bad in itself, it is more that I am feeling very stressed about life in general. If I put my family first, my thesis and my work falls apart. If I put my work first, I fall apart and my family suffers. If I put me first.... well who knows what would happend because I haven't tried that yet. There are many things that I love about the work that God brought me into but there are many things about it that I do not love and I guess I am having one of those weeks. One of those weeks where moving up north, living on 165 acres of mortgage free land in a large log home and living off the land suddenly seems appealing. Weeks where I think of dramatic life changes and the fact that when I went back to work I could have taken a job at Starbucks instead and while I would make less money, my job would not follow me home. And I'd get free espresso. Then again the reason I need the espresso is because of the job so perhaps it would not have been a perk afterall. Can you believe that I didn't drink coffee before I started this job? In fact I started drinking coffee when I took job that made me have to get up at 5:30 a.m. At least one person who reads this blog may remember the days when I would invite my girlfriends over for coffee on a friday morning and say "I never know how much coffee to put in because I never make the stuff, hope its not too strong!!" as they added hot water to their cups.

Despite feeling glum I've had two pick me ups this week. The first was a "mad" phone call from Stella. By mad I mean running through the room hysterically screaming mad not angry mad. We ranted and raved for several hours. Not surprisingly, we are, as always, on the same page yet again. The second pick me up was a pre-birthday present opening. DH was leaving for a 24 hour stint to the Yukon and I opened my present from him. As he was leaving, Gorilla says to me "Don't worry mom, I'll find someone to sleep with ya... now that your husband is leaving." I burst out laughing (despite the fact that 2 mins before I had been weeping like a woman who hasn't slept properly in 2 weeks and is overworked) and DH stopped dead in his tracks with his hilarious look on his face. Gorilla then added "Perhaps I could sleep with you." I realized then he was just working into a way to suggest he sleep in my bed, which he loves to do because it is so big and because we have a tv in our bedroom.